I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF

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I have no relationship with this jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-jaguar

Andreas Ruttenauer is editor-in-chief of "taz" and a passionate cyclist. He doesn’t have a driver’s license, tests from the passenger’s perspective. For the Jaguar XF it was four…-, There are six- and eight-cylinder engines that produce between 200 and 550 hp and which cost from 45,900 euros, Ruttenauer didn’t have much left

Source: Infographic Die Welt

Jaguar thinks of butlers, country estates, and noble families. But the mid-size sedan is missing the British. Car tester Andreas Ruttenauer goes hard with the XF.

NOf course, Bert was a good driver. He could steer with his thighs, shift with the left if he was holding a can of beer in his right hand, and talk to his cars in such a way that I always had the impression that they would understand him. He distributed praise (“That’s how I like it!”) And didn’t skimp on criticism if he thought it was appropriate (“You’re the biggest bastard I’ve ever driven”). He was one of those men who had a relationship with their cars.

The first great love of his life was a B-cadet. The love was so great that he was not embarrassed to caress his beloved vehicle in public. After chasing the cadet halfway decently over the Irschenberg on the way to a hut weekend in the Alps, he stopped at the nearest parking lot, lay down on the hood and tried to hug the whole car. Yes, he said it: "I love you!"

These luxury SUVs are on hold

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-jaguar

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Cryptic abbreviation, bright staging: as the C-X17, Jaguar showed in the run-up to the IAA 2013 how one imagines an SUV in Coventry. Now it is clear: The …

Source: picture alliance / dpa

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Jaguar Source Jaguar Source Jaguar

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… The “performance crossover” derived from this will be called F-Pace (the C-X17 study in the picture) and, like the XE mid-range sedan that will be launched in Germany in June, an aluminum arc…hitektur received. Jaguar sees the upcoming production car as a “sports car for the family”. In 2012 showed …

Source: picture alliance / dpa-tmn

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Ernst Thomas Bert Ritschie Gerd

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… Maserati presented their latest SUV design, the Kubang, at Auto China. But the Italian brand has been dealing with this type of car for a long time, like this one …

Source: picture alliance / dpa

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-relationship

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… Show car that was presented in Detroit in 2003 as the Kubang GT Wagon. Its exterior, designed by old car design master Giorgetto Giugiaro, has a contemporary effect… View out of date. Brought an appetizer for the upper class who were keen to buy …

Source: Maserati

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… Bentley 2012 to Auto China, where company boss Wolfgang Durheimer presented the concept of a luxury SUV from the British VW subsidiary, the EXP 9F. Under the name…n Bentayga, named after a mountain on Gran Canaria, the series version is due to hit the market in 2016. Also in 2012 showed another premium brand of the Wolfsburg-based group …

Source: picture alliance / dpa

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-jaguar

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… the Urus, a concept car from Lamborghini, the realization of which as a production car is likely. This announcement is meanwhile…

Source: picture alliance / dpa

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… Rolls-Royce arrived, although the British manufacturer has long rejected the topic of SUVs. In the spring of 2013, the brand denied noble limousines corresponding…such rumors vehemently. The fact that RR and SUV somehow go together was illustrated at the 2006 Geneva Motor Show by the Italian coachbuilder Castagna, who put the Imperial Landaulet Coupe in the spotlight, a mix of styles with references to earlier Rolls-Royce models, but also with design features of an SUV.

Source: picture-alliance / gms

At the hut there was no other topic for him than love for his car. Five men in their early twenties sat together, drank a lot and enjoyed Bert. I also sat there and pretended not to mind that there was only one subject on this hut trip: cars. When are you finally going to get your driver’s license? One of the men kept asking me this question. Then there was a laugh.

Ernst, Thomas, Bert, Ritschie and Gerd were guys with decent jobs. Machine fitters, precision mechanics, toolmakers. I was a Slavonic studies student and couldn’t even drive. And now I was sitting in this hut and had to listen to five men express their erotic car fantasies.

Only a real man can love a car

Again and again they pretended to integrate me into the conversation. And what do you say? It was a fun weekend for the five. It quickly became clear that something like a B cadet couldn’t be much more than a childhood sweetheart. You could love someone like that for a while, but if you were really serious, sooner or later you had to break up and turn to a real car. Even the GTI from Ernst was not made for eternal love, everyone quickly agreed on that. Or, Gerd wanted to know, is there anyone around the table who seriously wants to call a Golf a car.

Five pairs of eyes focused on me. No, never in life! Even I knew that, I said, and for a brief moment I even had the feeling that I belonged to this band of guys, about whom I didn’t know much more until this excursion than – like me – on Thursdays went to the “Aying Extra” in Herzogstrasse to drink.

It was well after midnight by the time the five finally agreed on the car that you must have loved if you want to be a real man. The Jaguar E-Type. I had heard that before. My father always raved about this Itaip. I never understood why he bought a VW Jetta, and I found it embarrassing long before it was clear that I would probably never get a driver’s license. The men laughed when I told them that. After all, I had now contributed a little anecdote to the hut evening.

German incompetence

Such a jaguar, the only real thing with the trademark of a big cat, I have learned in the hours until dawn, class, style, format, and it gives status. That you can design a metallic capsule on wheels so that it looks like a big cat jumping off is simply awesome, said Bert, and his eyes were glazed over.

This Landy is two cars in one

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Jaguar Source Jaguar Source Jaguar Source

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The Discovery Sport is the first completely new Land Rover in more than ten years and will inherit the Freelander at the end of February at prices starting at 32,250 euros.

Source: Land Rover

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The flair of freedom and adventure falls by the wayside: you look in vain for edges and with them character on the rounded body.

Source: Land Rover

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Although at just under 4.60 meters still with one axle in the segment of compact off-road vehicles like the VW Tiguan, the Discovery Sport offers different than direct competitors such as BM…W X3 or Audi Q5 and, in contrast to the Freelander, a third seat bench for an extra charge (1300 euros).

Source: Land Rover

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-relationship

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For the first time in this class, there is an optional head-up display for important displays, the instruments are hard to beat in terms of clarity, and a very decent Tou…chscreen with a brand new multimedia system replaces most buttons and pushers. What is still controlled directly is arranged in a correspondingly clear, large and handy manner.

Source: Land Rover

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Jaguar Source Jaguar Source Jaguar

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The Discovery Sport does not use the new engine family that was developed for the Jaguar XE, but starts with the familiar engines from the Evoque. There is…t therefore the choice between a 2.2 liter diesel with 150 or 190 hp and a turbo gasoline engine that draws 240 hp from a 2.0 liter displacement.

Source: Land Rover

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The consumption values ​​in the standard cycle are 8.0 liters for the Si4 petrol engine and 6.3 liters for the SD4, each with automatic.

Source: Land Rover

I wondered if he was just imagining what it would be like to lie on this car. And English, said Thomas, that was something special too, that only had an English car. Gerd was certain that the Germans could never build an English car like this.

The hour was well advanced when the jaguar crush was at its peak. As I stand in front of a brand new Jaguar XF, I wonder how Bert, whom I haven’t seen in 19 years, would be on the bonnet, whether he would develop any feelings for this car at all.

The beauty of the new jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Jaguar Source Jaguar Source Jaguar

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You can immediately recognize the new XE as a Jaguar, because the radiator grille is typical of the brand. In contrast to …

Source: Jaguar

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… However, the XE is smaller than the XF and XJ models: With an exterior length of 4.67 meters, it competes in the middle class and meets the German top dogs Mercedes C-Class and BMW …3 Series and Audi A4.

Source: Jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-relationship

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The interior, here the sports equipment, does not come as a surprise to Jaguar customers. Everything is kept in simple elegance, the rotary knob for rests on the center console …the automatic. But the infotainment system is new, and the much-criticized Jaguar navigation is said to have improved significantly.

Source: Jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Jaguar Source Jaguar Source Jaguar

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Despite the sporty lines, the XE offers enough space for the head and knees inside. The trunk has a volume of 455 liters and the rear seat backs are (as in BMW and Mercedes) in proportion…Old 40/20/40 foldable.

Source: Jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Ernst Thomas Bert Ritschie Gerd

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Jaguar Head of Design Ian Callum at the presentation of the XE in the specially built new workshop. 613 robots are working here to ensure that …

Source: Jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-jaguar

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… a new XE can roll into the brightly lit final inspection every 78 seconds.

Source: Jaguar

It says on his own website that he is instantly recognizable as a Jaguar, feels like a Jaguar and drives like a Jaguar. I also wonder whether Thomas, who knows for sure that Jaguar has long since been absorbed by the Indian Tata group, would identify this limousine as typically English. In the passenger seat I try to feel the soul of this car and feel: nothing.

"First get a driver’s license"

I close my eyes and try to imagine how I am being driven in this car over crunching gravel to the door of the handsome country estate of an old English aristocratic family. I see the butler step outside and expect him to open the door for me to show me to the entrance. But the butler doesn’t open the door for me. He casts a contemptuous look at the jaguar, as if to say: "How dare he allow himself to be driven up here in such an honest car."

The F-Type with a roof is so beautiful

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Ernst Thomas Bert Ritschie Gerd

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The 4.47 meter long F-Type coupe was launched in April 2014, ten months later than the Roadster.

Source: Jaguar

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The sports seats are nice and firm, you sit very deep in them, but otherwise have plenty of space. The best thing about the interior is the ergonomically superbly placed fear grip for… the passenger on the center console.

Source: Jaguar

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Ernst Thomas Bert Ritschie Gerd

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The roof line of the coupe is beautifully done, under the tailgate there is a trunk with a volume of 407 liters.

Source: dpa-tmn

I have no relationship with the Jaguar XF-Source Jaguar Source Jaguar Source

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Prince Harry has also driven the F-Type, of course in England and of course in the right seat.

Source: REUTERS

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The F-Type S Coupe costs € 78,500 exactly € 7,000 less than the Roadster.

Source: Jaguar

I open my eyes and I’m pretty sure that the vehicle I’m sitting in somehow doesn’t tell me anything. I would never be able to talk to him like Bert did to his B-cadet. I can’t even imagine a relationship. Whether Ernst, Thomas, Bert, Ritschie and Gerd would even call the XF a car?

After returning from the hut, of course, I wanted to know quickly what an E-Type looks like. Somehow good, I thought to myself, and next Thursday I wanted Bert to explain to me exactly what the difference was between the love for a B-Kadett and that for this Jaguar. I could have guessed the answer. “You don’t understand anything about that. First get a driver’s license. "

I take another close look at the XF. I stroke him on the roof. A feeling may just not set in, not even when looking at the cockpit. Is it really just up to me that I can’t develop a relationship with this car??

Andreas Ruttenauer is editor-in-chief of "taz".

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