What Tesla boss Elon Musk really told the Mayor of Hamburg

satire

What Tesla boss Elon Musk really told the Mayor of Hamburg

What Tesla boss Elon Musk really told the Mayor of Hamburg-told
dpa/Chris Carlson/AP Tesla boss Elon Musk indicated at the most recent general meeting that the group may soon promote important metals itself.

  • Site editor Sebastian Viehmann

Because its electric cars are slowly approved in Germany, Elon Musk buried the collar. He complained to German mayors. What came up? We can imagine it. A satirical billing.

For links on this page, Site receives. A commission from the dealer, Z.B. For marked. After a long back and forth, you finally buy your Tesla, it is best to immediately drive down your 500 kilometers at once with a battery charge and then you shouldn’t do it. First of all, the vehicle must be approved. And that can take – especially in Hamburg -.As the "World" reported, some Tesla customers from Hamburg took a breath by Twitter that they had to wait several days for the approval of their new Teslas. For this they turned directly to Tesla boss Elon Musk. He then personally called at Hamburg Mayor Peter Tschentscher (SPD) to complain. In addition to Hamburg’s mayor, Musk is also said to have rang through the Burgemeister Berlin, Michael Muller (SPD) – because there it takes much, much longer to admit a new car.

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The phone protocol

The Hamburg Senate press office confirmed the phone call, but did not want to announce any further details. But we know how the conversation went – here is the exclusive telephone protocol!Elon Musk: “Elon Musk here. Listen, why does it take until you allow our cars with you? Damn ax!"Mayor: “Can you please speak a little louder, the cell phone reception is so bad here."

"Admission! Why do people have to wait so long?"" We are really sorry! However, the problems should be resolved soon, but we recently updated the computers in the registration office to Windows 95. You know, Mr. Musk: In Germany, digitization is always a top priority!"" Lord again, the only thing that is a top priority with you is your lambar! And the kilowatt hour of electricity costs you 30 cents, I heard – seven cents in the USA! No wonder that it takes so long for you for an electric car pay off!"But we have green electricity for that! So if there is any – we have had a power failure in Hamburg, and that will probably happen more often in Germany in the future, because we are the only country in the world to get out of coal and nuclear power and have no alternatives for a safe power supply yet."" WTF???“" Yes, you know that we Germans are more clever than their backward American: We always see the risks and never the chances with a technology. For example, in Hamburg, we have just diesel driving bans for two streets, and the warning association "German Environmental Aid", which has achieved this for us, the German taxpayer also finances with millions. Now the single nurse can no longer use her diesel polo, but it has the good feeling of saving the environment and will now see the electric car much more positively than before! Forbid instead of promoting, building obstacles instead of infrastructure – punish you, educate hundreds! Do not recognize the ingenuity behind this plan?““ Above all, I realize that your auto industry will be on the ass in five years. People run the booth to us and we hardly come after production because they all want the model 3 – can you please step on the gas? And if it is only when it comes to approval of e-mobility…"" Momeeent, but they underestimate our auto industry! We have the best gaps in the world – as is well known, this is the most important thing for every electric car – and once we come with our super stromers, 2025 or something, then the lights go out at Tesla! Now do not build pressure just because a few customers (probably two, hehe) want to allow a Tesla. There is the BMW i3, the Audi e-tron … "" The boxes don’t even create 400 kilometers of range! What do you want to compete with, with the toaster in my kitchen?"" But think of the risks! And to the children who have to scratch the cobalt in the Congo .."“Our batteries now hardly need cobalt! You hornochers at what the state of the art you are actually?“" (Cries quietly) The connection is just so bad again, wait, I call it out of my dialing phone. (2 minutes later) so, now the crackling is a bit quieter. So under us: You are right … Can’t help us a little? Maybe with battery production? Or with research?"" You don’t have your own battery research? I don’t think all of this!""Then come to us! You just have to get a little, let’s say, come down on the German patchwork and make friends with the new German planned economy. For example, we will settle our battery research in Munster in the future because of the soon unemployed coal buddy in North Rhine-Westphalia. That was such a back room deal against the declared advice of experts, they understand. But Munster! If the top international researchers are not in line immediately! Do you know the Munsterland? There are many bikes. And cows. And two sau cool crime scene commissioners.“Tuut, tuut, tuut… – on the top.(This text is satire. The scheduled small state of Germany in electromobility is unfortunately a reality.)))

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2 thoughts on “What Tesla boss Elon Musk really told the Mayor of Hamburg”

  1. Fond,
    But unfortunately it is. I always have to find that the rejection of the electric car or … of renewable energies among most people here in D on half knowledge and regulars’ table wisdom, much of it is simply wrong. Before not getting the current and precise information about it, the same wrong, meanwhile overtook and still overtook for the umpteenth time "generally valid" Statement to do so.

    Reply
  2. A lot of sad "Real satire" included…
    "…For example, in Hamburg, we have just diesel driving bans for two streets, and the warning association "German Environmental Aid", which has achieved this for us, the German taxpayer also finances with millions. Now the single nurse can no longer use her diesel polo, but it has the good feeling of saving the environment and will now see the electric car much more positively than before! Forbid instead of promoting, building obstacles instead of infrastructure – punish you, educate hundreds! Do not recognize the ingenuity behind this plan?…" There is really no one to add anymore…

    Reply

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